For example we want to the user to be able to lerp between male and female by a slider, you can do this by modeling both from the same topology.
Assume we already have a male base model. Move all vertices so it looks female, but don't add or remove vertices.
For each vertex store the difference to the original male position. (we call this a relative 'morph shape', or 'blend shape').
In the game the character then is made by male_vertex + female_offset * gender_slider.
You can also handle details this way, e.g. make just the nose large (so most vertex differences are zero). You can combine all options simply by: male_vertex + female_offset * gender_slider + nose_offset * nose slider...
The second option to consider is to affect skeleton bones, e.g. Male: wide shoulders, narrow pelvis, Female: narrow shoulders, wide pelvis.
You can utilize scale and sheer as well for skinny / fat and so forth.
But with caution, as altering skeletons also affects its animations.