Hello everybody! At first must to sorry for my poor english, just not native and hope you can understand me well. Anyway, I’m up for any questions.

This post is not directly related to gamedev. I guess it’s more about psychology where I need help from creative peoples who maybe had same problems as me, what about would be written here.

Well, I’m just 23 years old guy who work now in company as selling manager (well, not so much work, I do what would be asked for, mainly I’m here as anykey cause these peoples in ages don’t understand anything) well, not a bad place but damn very boring. Since childhood I grew on Sonic series games on sega (and on my first PC after in 13) and since that time gamedev industry has been interesting for me. Mostly draw level schemes for platformers, writing any gameplay ideas for something else, drawing labyrinths was been like a drug for me. But, well, this is not about past.

This time I’m trying to learn a lot what can be useful in gamedev. I tried modeling, coding, design concepting, pixel art, learning unreal engine, even music creation and something else. This is what I learn just for last two years. And what I have now? Really nothing. All what I learn now I only know at basic level: I know python and maybe can make looking as shit simple script working with json file but nothing more, I made looking as same shit hammer in blender with useless topology but cannot make simple good looking scene or object with good looking materials, I draw small wizard pixel-by-pixel looking at reference and stuck in the mud when tried to animate him, google docs filled with the beginnings of design documents of pc and tabletop games, where two of tabletop even made in simulator but still not end. Draw pictures? Hah, I never draw something harder than country flag, three rectangles, in perspective… but even know that I never can be a draw artist I raped photoshop and krita.. and Nicolas Cage.. sorry dude, but you was been chosen as reference...

And now when I try to start something again to learn I fly into a rage just after small mistake or little problem. Model have issues with polygons, damn blender alt+F4! something wrong with code, gtfo PyCharm! Last rows of a poem seem delirium… hm, let’s burn this file with 5 hours work in trash bin!

Well, the main problem in this time not about rage. Now I just cannot even calmly sit in the chair, open document and write more and more. I have one project idea and make only 30 pages of design document of it. Now need to start to make first wiki pages of it and go deeper in details, very big project. And I just cannot do it. Every time I try to continue write that document I discouraged, feeling passive, lazy and apathy. And again zero progress. Sadly it’s now with everything. Very hard to keep learning and do something. It’s all very interesting to me but feel so bad everytime I try to do something. Funny thing, but this question I had tried to make at least 2-3 weeks ago and do it only today.

Maybe, anyone here also had same problem, when like something happen and cannot do anything? What you did to be productive in your work? And how you find what you really like? Just I think that one of problems for me is because really cannot chose what is more interesting for me. Hope you can help me somehow.

Big thank in advance for any answers.

Focus on smaller bites and segments of a project. I've worked on projects covering things ranging over subjects such as video games, houses, robotic weapons platforms, and even full length novels. None of these get done by sitting there and hammering away at the whole thing as one giant titian of a creation. They get broken down into segments and parts.

What is the purpose of the project? What kind of things does it need? A game needs a window framework, or somewhere to exist within the overarching UI of the computer.

A house needs a foundation, and then rooms rooms on top of that. And room layouts are based on budget and needs, and flows for how one would actually live in them. Putting the kitchen and pantry on the far side of the house away from where you could bring groceries in isn't the most user friendly idea, so sit down and think through the project of how and why things should exist. However, you don't need to sit down and finalized every last little detail. You will know that you want to add trim and such, but the exact profile used doesn't really matter and you can put that off till later.

Break the overarching problem of a project down into smaller chunks that allow you to actually make decisions.

- What does the project need to be made up of to work? What are the 'parts' to it?

- Do any of these parts depend on other parts before decisions can be finalized?

- Can any of the parts that need to be squared away before others be broken down into smaller parts themselves?

- Repeat as needed and start finding pieces that you can start the 'real work' on.

Keep calm, make lists, document stuff, and sort out what works for you to get things done.

Hmmm, I always start things, so getting ready is not a problem: I draw sketches, I define styles, start to think on gameplay specifics, draw lots of mockups that helps me anticipate lots of stuff. Then I go to code, work on a 2d character controller (I just do 2d games on my own projects) to have a controllable thing on the screen, generally its just a single frame for some main poses (idle, walking, jumping) to start get the feel of the game.

My problem is I get tired of things really fast, at the time I have everything on track Im already not inspired on the idea anymore, and start having new ideas..And thats the story of my life.

Its been quite long time that Ive been limiting my scopes to help me finish something, but its not working. One of the last game idea I come up with "just one character", so every enemy and the player would be the same sprite, that would cut the work a lot. Id only have to changes colors and armor.

The thing is, Im not that much found of simple games, at the time the idea is polished, its already way more complex than I expected. Cause otherwise the inspiration doesnt even sparks. So in that game idea, since everyone would be the same character, why not add some different moves right? Vert slashs, horz slahs, thrust, all with one handed and double handed sword versions...>_< never happened. In some other idea I decided come up with a sketch style (no colors, no polishment in the art), that would also cut a lot of work..

The funniest thing of all is that at every place I work on Im the efficient guy nobody understand how Im always at 100%.. But thats because I dont really care, I have no personal attachments, I just do the best I can in the time imposed to me.

So getting stuff done is also problem to me too...But learning stuff I both like doing and want is really natural to me. I dont go "what to learn today". Its more like "I need/want to do this, but dont know how->research". That worked extremely well for 2d art (Ive been drawing nonstop my entire life) and programming (hmmm since ~2004?, I dont remember).

I tried to do music, pirated Fruit Loops, watched some tutorials...cant do anything in it...I still want to try to focus on getting some music done. Some times I have music theme ideas, I compose some parts of then in my head, but dont know how to put it anywhere and end up forgetting about them.

The main problem here: Im yet to find enjoyable tryng to make music..contrary to programming and drawing, I cant make any sense out of music or how ppl learn it. Most ppl just learn to play music already exist...that would be like drawing by only copying stuff, which is useless. I want to learn how to take musics out of my head. But if I never find a way to make this enjoyable, I will give up. Otherwise is not worth it. When you enjoy something, even if youre shit at it (or end up not being good enough) is still worth cause youre having fun.

Thats just a point of view thou, not really an answer to anything.

Break the overarching problem of a project down into smaller chunks that allow you to actually make decisions.

That's not a problem, I know almost about how to design project, read some topics in gamedev coms like this one e.t.c Only sadly thing that I cannot see on any design documents for big popular projects of designers who already make them. A problem is that I cannot concentrate on something at all, too many excess ideas, wishes about to know a lot (like I tell in topic: programming, modelling e.t.c) and this all make difficult just to sit and start work on at least something. As a result - no progress on any project or at least on learning in any direction and irritation for another lost day.

My problem is I get tired of things really fast, at the time I have everything on track Im already not inspired on the idea anymore, and start having new ideas..And thats the story of my life.

Same with me, but a bit different: I have too many ideas and wanna make everything and learn about everything, even as I understand that I cannot be good in everything... So I jump from thing to thing without do much...

Now I grieved that I didn't learn about something in childhood when you have much more possibles..

Maybe try setting goalposts for yourself?

"I want X finished by Y" - Start with "General concept/goal of the project, an overview of things done by the end of the day."

Tomorrow, start working on narrowing down what you need to have done, and assigning goal posts to those as well. Narrow in on a target for something that can be achieved in less than a week, and try to reach that goal in the set time factor.

Maybe try setting goalposts for yourself?

That's also fail. If I make a goalpoints, I do everything but not what must. Still problem with that I didn't have any priority in things, I like a lot of things and wanna to do all of them...

Well, I suffer from almost same thing for a long while. Days are usually with none to very few progress even though I am currently busy with reconciling game modules. And same situation, I want everything to be perfectly done in unrealistic almost magical ways. Also, I am not happy with learning something barely enough or good enough, I have to learn all about inside out.

For example, I'm rusty in Javascript, although I know that what I need is dedicating time and making a lot of mistakes and exercises on the road I want to read a magic book or watch a video and become proefficient in Javascript without writing single line of code. And when I don't get easily get a concept (hello closures o/) I am discouraged. Same is valid for Blender as well, I just want to learn creating basic geometry then make superb modelling :D which isn't case without dedicating time or even with doing it.

I believe what I most suffer is procrastination ( you probably did but if not better watch http://www.ted.com/talks/tim_urban_inside_the_mind_of_a_master_procrastinator ) , I am almost always too lazy, distracted, ungrateful and unprepared to do something non-stop and dedicated. Especially when you're self employed and there's no deadline, people tend to act like it's never late but ofc that's not the case for mortals.

I think procrastination is a form of "poverty trap". It's like you fell down to a well and there are stairs just out of well, problem is you can't reach stairs because you're in well and you're in well because you don't have stairs. In such case there are only two options imo, either find another solution to get out ( discover stones to climb up) or get external help (let somebody throw stairs down)

Currently I'm trying to concentrate and making things in small chunks, not going as good as I want but gaining momentum :)

You want to start with small projects. Even the smallest project you can think of requires significant work and mental efforts. Don't underestimate them, but projects will take your skill to the next level because they define the purpose of your work. Without the purpose, you are stuck making random python scripts and models like you are doing now.

But projects that are too big is daunting and would actually discourage you. Keep it small but exciting. Always make a progress everyday when working on your project, even though it's small. If you don't feel like working on that design doc, force yourself to write just one paragraph for that day. Even a small progress counts.

Maybe concentrate on one thing first? You are basically trying to learn 4 or 5 very different skills at the same time here. Which will, of course, take WAY more than 2 years to get anywhere.

Maybe decide for yourself what is most enjoyable for you, and concentrate on that for 6 months. Like learning how to program, or 3D modelling, or 2D art. Then trying to hammer out clear and achievable goals for those 6 months, and really start working at it without getting distracted. If you feel like you are getting distracted again, maybe that part of game dev just isn't for you?

Maybe concentrate on one thing first? You are basically trying to learn 4 or 5 very different skills at the same time here.

More than 4-5 skills.. And yes, I know about that problem, but:
I guess it's in my stupid mind, first problem is that when I do one thing, always think that in other thing I'll be better, btw, I have initiates in that skills and would be sad to totally lose them. And second - every little mistake or problem I cannot solve turn me in rage, even more stupid if I found a solution at last but it's not work. Eventually if I try to "concentrate" and learn something for long time enthusiasm ends earlier than a week.

Always make a progress everyday when working on your project, even though it's small. If you don't feel like working on that design doc, force yourself to write just one paragraph for that day. Even a small progress counts.

Everyday think to start transfer my design doc from google docs to dokuwiki and work about project details but can't even make a paragraph,,, Every damn day... And still don't understand why...