Thanks for the suggestions, I think I'll try Notepad++ and Programmers Notepad first; I already encountered their websites but couldnt see from the feature lists if they would do what I need. Sublime looks neat, but I was just looking for something simple and dont want to spend that money when I would just use 10% of it.
Oh and yes, the problem with the mixed lineendings or missing spaces and cluttered diffs was one reason I asked for this. I disabled automatic line ending conversion in hg and git, because I would actually like having everything more consistent with just LF even on Windows and I dont like running the risk of silent corruption of a binary file.
The other problem is when some files with mostly text and a bit of binary or which would not work with other lineendings or spaces/tabs removed would get screwed up, but at same time it would be inconvenient and weird to use a hexeditor for.