Hello again, time to present you guys with another of my game ideas! Comments and critiques are welcome. Fallen Angel In the beginning, God created the world, and his heavenly hosts marvelled at his power. God then made man in his image and the angels were instructed to bow before the image of God. Gabriel was the first, then Michael, soon Lucifer was to bow. But Lucifer, the Angel of Light, refused to lower himself to something so inferior, a beast of the earth. Being the most beautiful and glorious angel in the heavens, he was certain that it was he the humans should bow to. "Why should I, a being of fire, lower myself to a being of dust? Those who are created after me, inferior to me, should bow to my name!" The majority of the angels were infuriated at his audacity but a few listened to his words and also refused to bow. With this, Lucifer started building his army. Slowly he gained new followers as God directed more of his love towards the humans and less towards the affairs of the heavely host. After hundreds of Earth years, Lucifer decided the time was right to ascend to his rightful place. To be like "The most High" and he was to use his army to do it. Michael, the Archangel and general of God's heavely army noticed darkness creeping into some of the beings of heaven. He saw changes in each that followed Lucifer in his teachings of self-worship. He was not aware of what they had in store. Michael was teaching his apprentice a new style of swordplay when the Army of Lucifer struck, destroying a third of heaven before Michael could rouse his angels for battle. Taking up his sword, he vowed to slay Lucifer and present his head to the Lord. Corbin, a Seraphim was a small ranked fighter for the Army of Heaven. Suddenly Michael's voiced boomed throughout that their swords were to be drawn and ready to fight. Battle ensued and each side sustained heavy losses but the Heavenly Army won, enabling God to banish each of the fallen to the Earth. Satan, the Accuser grabbed Corbin before being slung by God's power and dragged him to Earth, destroying all of his heavenly powers in the process. Upon his bloody landing, Lucifer walked to Corbin and cut off his wings. "You are now one of the Fallen, the God of this world has forsaken you." Corbin cried in pain and horror as the thought of being seperated from God hit him. With a scream he struggled to right himself and fight but his powers left him and he was now one of the weakest of the angels. "Enjoy.." Lucifer said before walking off with his army of what were now demons. Michael sobbed with sorrow as he realized his apprentice was somehow taken to Earth. There was no way Michael could bring him back to heaven for he had lost his Light and was no longer able to rejoin the Heavenly Host. God then spoke to Michael, "Why dost sorrow overtake thee?" "Corbin he is lost!" "He is doing my will" God says.. [Edited by - KidAero on December 5, 2006 8:14:49 PM]

The first thing I notice is that this game idea is based on a religious topic.
Many people will take offence if everything isn't as they believe, even if it is just a game.

Secondly, this seems to be just the story behind the game. What about actual gameplay?

Well iw as getting to that after the story =P

1st off, yeah I know extremely touchy subject but I'm changing the names and whole feel of it so that you can see the similarities if you know the full detail of the biblical story but to any random person, you won't recognize it.

Gameplay : Action/Adventure

As a Heavenly being with no wings, you start off with no power at all. An old man wishing for the best crafts you a sword to fight the demons and you're off. Sword play is gonna be a big so I'm going to try to have a mouse controlled swordaction type play close to Star Wars Jedi Knight 2 : Jedi Outcast *tight ass game* except more detailed. You'll earn Merit which adds up to Beatitude (Levels) as you go slaying demons that have possessed people. The angel will first have to pull the demon from the human without harming him and then slay the demon.

Along the way you may meet people to help you with your quest, some may be crafters and could build u a bigger more powerful sword, or light faster one. Some may trade you shoes or craft you metal coverings for your wings for aerial battle. W/e. The world will span most of Asia/Africa and Europe in detail but by the time you have wings again, you won't care one bit.

Demons are made by a sect of Fallen Angels ran by Lucifer who corrupts small animals and spirits to do his bidding (Imps, djinn, vampires, most fabled and mythical beings). With each Demon and Fallen Angel you defeat, you gain back more of your power and your rank in the Angelic Heirarchy returns. Before long you'll be sporting 6 wings and a bitchin sword as you fight things like the Behemoth, Leviathan, and Dragons as you push forward to save humanity from its Demonic oppression!

Quote: Original post by Anonymous Poster
Secondly, this seems to be just the story behind the game. What about actual gameplay?

(Warning: Completely off-topic)
One time I went to a link like this from the Recent Threads page and just started going off about how the story is irrelevant and where is the gameplay synopsis and so on. Started rebutting the claims that pre-written stories are relevant, etc.

Then I realized that the thread was on the Writing for Games board. Oops. You know, just like this thread is. [grin] That being said, starting with a story often makes for generic gameplay. Don't know if my 2 cents is worth 2 cents, though. [lol]

Quote: 1st off, yeah I know extremely touchy subject but I'm changing the names and whole feel of it so that you can see the similarities if you know the full detail of the biblical story but to any random person, you won't recognize it.

With a story that is that biblical, it might be difficult to hide the fact that it is religious. Also, the religious theme might be an interesting selling point. Consider films like Fallen, End of Days, Constantine, Dogma... these movies deal with religious fantasy yet still hit the mainstream. Fundamentalist Christianity doesn't have as tight a hold on the market as one might think, and since most marketers avoid it because they are scared of offending a portion of the audience it is a concept that is wide open for new ideas.

Believe it or not, Constantine inspired it so I wasn't as afraid of the religious concept as one might think. I just don't know if pulling in big names like those into a game will work as well as it does in those movies listed above. That's why I'm changing them in near-future time.

I think it's actually a pretty cool concept, except...

anyone who's read Paradise Lost will immediately feel distracted by the dissimilarities. I think if you could fit it more to that plot-line you'd have a better shot at capturing people's interest. It's actually pretty similar, except rather than an initial war, Satan and his followers were instead immediately banished from heaven and chained to a lake of fire. (God is ALL-powerful). You could start your story after Milton's, after Satan has corrupted man-kind, and before Paradise Regained's storyline which deals with Jesus and the New Testament.

See, Satan has this council of demons who each share their ideas on what to do about their banishment from Heaven. Moloch suggests all-out war on Heaven. Belial suggests waiting to see God's next move. Mammon suggests making Hell a great place to live and to ultimately rival heaven. And Beelzebub suggests corrupting man. In your story, Satan could decide that corrupting man was not enough, and that Moloch's suggestion is the next best option. That'd be badass, especially because you'd have to render a lake of fire.

Oh yeah, and why the name "Corbin?" Reminds me of "Korben Dallas," Bruce Willis' character in the 5th element.

Ultimately, regardless of my suggestions, I like how epic you're planning your story to be!

Wow, I usually read these story ideas and am completely bored by all the same things. But this is really different and good. Also, I'm one of the least religious people you will meet, but I really like this storyline (i guess i've always liked religious-fantasy). Anyway, nice job.

ha thanks guys, first of my stories that have caught your interests lol.
to Munky - I wouldnt want a game played off of someone else's work plus what I have written above is not even clse to the finished product but something I threw together around the initial idea of what I'm writting. In fact, yesterday it just came to me after looking up Constantine on Wikipedia and so I worked on how one angel would try and save human kind from the corruption of fallen angels. What it really should've been was Grigori or Watcher/Guardian angels of the early humans finding human women and having children with them creating Nephilim, or large savage giants which decimate humanity. But of course they can always be added in later xD

Back to the demons though, the reason they attack the humans is because LUcifer feels God loves them more than he does his first creations. He intends to take them out of the picture.

And Corbin is the name of a guy I game with from time to time lol (really bad-ass name though) xD

Thanks to all for the comments.

Alright, but to condense my previous explanation, Milton's Paradise Lost is one of the most highly regarded and commonly taught texts in the English language. I think if you deviate from that story (which has come to be somewhat of a commonly-accepted standard for the biblical event of Satan's exile) then people will lose some immersion from the game as they realize it doesn't "fit" with the story they're used to. Just a suggestion, though.

To: KidAero

I like the initial idea with Corbin forced to group with the demons, because it made me feel pity for Corbin and wanted to know how things would turn out.

When Satan grabbed Corbin, cut his wing, and said 'You are now one of the Fallen', I was expecting that Satan would perform a major brainwash on Corbin, that Corbin would become a very loyal demon, while God understands that Corbin's becoming a loyal demon is part of His plan.

However, in your explanation, it seems that Corbin did not lose any of his identity as an angel.