We have all (I would hope) had fairly unique states of minds from time-to-time. Perhaps from drug use, perhaps from a disability, or perhaps just from a lucid dream.
The most unique mental state in which I have ever been happened under none of these conditions.
Some people have seizures and need to have their left and right brains disconnected, or damage one half of their brains in accidents. This leaves them unable to identify objects even though they can see their colors etc. In the case of separating the brains, if a person looks at an apple with his or her right eye he or she can tell it is red but not an apple, and with the left eye he or she can tell it is an apple but not what color.
When we look at people in these documentaries we can’t help but say, “How can you not see it is an apple?? Just look at the friggin’ shape!”. It is hard for us to understand how they can’t identify an apple, even though prior to their surgery they easily could have. They have known for their whole lives what an apple is.
I was able for a short time appreciate their situation first-hand, and finally understand how it really feels to suddenly be able to not identify anything you see.
One day while staying at a friend’s house I awakened on his couch.
I looked around the room confused. I could not recognize where I was, nor even that this was a room. I believe I did not even have true depth-perception, though I was too focused on figuring out where I was to be sure.
I could see “shapes” such as the straight lines that made the edges of walls and his computer desk and I could see all the colors, but no shape had any meaning as an object.
I continued scanning down the hall, then along the wall back my way with all the computers on a desk attached to it.
Suddenly I noticed movement!
I glanced quickly back down the hall. Yes, something there was moving. I had completely glanced over it the first time, just being another object like all the others.
I studied it as it moved for a while. It was mostly round and a smaller thing moving to the left. What was it?
Finally the right side of my brain “awakened”.
Suddenly I recognized everything, including that moving object. It was the friend at whom’s place I was staying. The first movement that caught my eye was when he leaned back in his chair and I saw his head move. His hand went back and forth from the mouse and keyboard a few times, explaining the other movements I saw.
Not only could I not recognize it was my friend, I could not even recognize it was a human. Until he moved I couldn’t separate him from any other colored figure around me.
This has only happened once and is not caused by any underlying conditions; just a very very rare delay in waking activity on one side of the brain, but it gave me insight into how some people with damaged right hemispheres have to live their lives. Like the man who can’t recognize faces and can’t find his own wife at the grocery store if they separate or those who can’t say it’s an apple by looking with just one eye.
When you live your whole life with 2 hemispheres that are always in full communication it is hard to understand these types of conditions, and I am glad for the insight and that it was only temporary in my case.
In what was the strangest mental state you have been?
L. Spiro