T[color="#1C2837"]hat attempting to discuss a prewriting synopsis is either "cheating" or "impossible to do usefully". I've heard all these complaints before.[/quote]
[color="#1C2837"]
[color="#1C2837"]lolz. That's a wild one. Some people do have this mental image of writers as just puking brilliance onto a page. While myself I don't formally write plans, it's primarily because that doesn't work in my system, which does normally involve a lot of pre-thinking, discussion with my "inner circle" and iterating. In my mind the only cheating is plagiarism.
[color="#1C2837"]
[color="#1C2837"][color="#1C2837"]I still question whether most of my writing has any relevance to this forum. I do have one project which has no erotic content, so that's an obvious candidate. It's a science fiction alien archeology thing with a mild interracial romance between the two main characters.[/quote]
[color="#1C2837"]
I think all writing is relevant.[/font]
I don't think there's any difference as long as one understands that all writing has use cases.
[color="#1c2837"]Plus, video games all vary so wildly that no two projects present the same kind of use case and maybe this isn't a universal but my gut feeling is that anyone who can write in general can meet any use case already.
[color="#1c2837"]Therefore, everyone learning to write here is, simply put, learning to write. All types of writing are then appropriate exercises.
[color="#1c2837"]A second issue is that this forum is (to me anyway) its own sub community and the more activity, the better.
Entries and Voting For Writing Contest 1 - Character Concept
350
October 03, 2011 09:09 PM
[font="arial, verdana, tahoma, sans-serif"]
October 03, 2011 11:38 PM
Miss 1: The two scenes are consecutive.
In the first scene (Wheat field), Skyle discussed about the shadow and decide to let the shadow knows that she understands. In the second scene (carnival), Skyle is in the shadow's mind talking to the shadow. I think what I could do is to add a sentence fragment in the beginning of the second scene:
[quote name='Before']Skyle found herself in a crowded place like a carnival. There was a big tent. In the tent there was an announcer with a top hat, the announcer said:
[/quote]
Oh wow, that was all happening inside someone's mind? That makes way more sense. And yes, I think adding that sentence would fix it.
Miss 2: Shadows are stuck not because they can't think, but because they have blind-spots in their thinking
Shadows are stuck not because they can't think, but because they have blind-spots in their thinking. In cases like this decision matrices don't help because to use this type of decision matrix, you need to know what criteria matter and evaluate their weights. If you have a blind-spot, you can crutch out the numbers but you will not wholeheartedly agree with the result. In your heart you know that something is amiss, but you can't pin-point it. You could go on with that decision but it still leaves a hole in your heart unanswered. That is what a shadow is. Shadows are shadow not because they have no clue, but because they do have some clue, but something doesn't feel right. They may be doing the right thing but their motivation might be misaligned and they feel empty doing something that they know to be the right thing. Solving shadows isn't just about making the right choice, but explaining to the self fully why it is the right choice.
In the story, the author knows this. So this explanation could be included in the wheat field scene just after the player choices.
[quote name='Before']
I thought:
a) He should just say it. Then at least he won't regret for not saying it.
b) He should learn how to say it in a way that people would listen
c) He should believe that people could learn on their own
d) He should believe that for some lessons, people could only learn from their own experience.
e) He should believe that what was an ordeal for him wasn't an ordeal for someone else
f) He should do something so that the others wouldn't get near that situation in the first place
g) ...
I said: "Do you agree with what he said?"
"I think so, why?" She said.
"Maybe he just want to know that someone understands."
"Is that it?"
"Worth a try."
"Alright!"
* * *
Skyle found herself in a crowded place like a carnival. There was a big tent. In the tent there was an announcer with a top hat, the announcer said:
My instinct is to say, don't use the word shadow for the person, instead use the word shadow for the stuck thought belonging to the person. Because the whole person isn't tainted or changed by this type of problem, instead it is like a person who has a knotted-up muscle, so they can still walk but the muscle needs to be massaged loose before they can run at full speed and coordination. The term is functional either way though, and I agree that the wheat field scene is a good place for this explanation. Or if you are using these scenes in a larger work you could even have such an explanation in a scene where the I character is first told by Skyle that she is entering people's minds to fix shadows.
My personal opinion would be that a blind-spot in thinking is fixed by reevaluating and changing the decision-making matrix, because the incorrect current decision-making matrix is the rationale which convinces them they should keep doing what they are are calculating to be the correct thing to do. But I had no trouble understanding or accepting your explanation quoted above. Actually, perhaps yours is more widely applicable, since mine would have difficulty fitting a case where a person was repeatedly doing something they did not regard as correct, such as getting drunk or having outbursts of temper.
I want to help design a "sandpark" MMO. Optional interactive story with quests and deeply characterized NPCs, plus sandbox elements like player-craftable housing and lots of other crafting. If you are starting a design of this type, please PM me. I also love pet-breeding games.
1,007
October 04, 2011 03:55 PM
Actually 'Shadow' does mean the thought pattern that traps the person. My writing is missing a good word that means "The person who has the shadow". Sometimes I call that the person who has the shadow the "host", but it sounds too clinical or to formal to me. I don't want people to imagine that shadows are mysterious or well-studied. If they sound too cool, people would want to have them rather than solve them.
I think the sentence could be changed like this:
* * *
The other kind of decision matrix
[font="Arial"]When you mentioned decision matrix the first time, I thought that you were referring to something else. But then I googled 'decision matrices' and found that they aren't what I thought they were. [/font][font="Arial"]Your decision matrix is a evaluation method in which you list the possible actions as headers, and score them by criteria. [/font][font="Arial"]My decision matrix is a map that relates circumstances to an appropriate action. The axes are the dimensions of the circumstance, and the cells contain the action appropriate for that circumstance. My decision matrix is also inapplicable for the problems about shadows. [/font][font="Arial"]Here I am just trying to show you what it is. I don't know the name for it.
Example:
a) He should just say it. Then at least he won't regret for not saying it.
b) He should learn how to say it in a way that people would listen
c) He should believe that people could learn on their own
d) He should believe that for some lessons, people could only learn from their own experience.
e) He should believe that what was an ordeal for him wasn't an ordeal for someone else.
f) He should do something so that the others wouldn't get near that situation in the first place.
Based on the concepts above, whether to tell the message depends on the following:
1) Will you regret for not saying it
2) Will people reject the message
2) Can people learn on their own
4) Is it a lesson that people can only learn from experience
5) Does the listener need the message
6) Can the problem that the message addresses be avoided
Conceptually, you could consider that each of these six dimensions takes on a Yes or a No. Then if you map it as a matrix, there are 2^6 = 64 cells. Each cell represents a specific situation. If these six questions are all that matters to describe a circumstance, and if you could fill out all 64 cells with appropriate actions that you can do, then you can handle any situation as long as you can tell which situation you are in. Here are the assumptions without the run-on sentence:
D1) You know all dimensions that are important to classify the situations
D2) You know the appropriate action given a specific situation
D3) You know how to tell what situation you are in.
D4) You can perform the appropriate action.
The short conclusion is that if you have a blind-spot, and the blind-spot is blocking something important enough to give you a shadow, you are screwed regardless which matrix you use. Decision matrices are still useful because a person's blind-spot changes over time, and it saves time of re-thinking what to do in a given situation.
This is my decision matrix regarding if I should post something:
The main dimensions are:
D1) Would people want to read it? (Yes / No)
D2) Do I have time to post it? (Yes / No)
D3) Am I explaining my story? (Yes / No)
These are the actions:
[font="Courier New"]1 2 3
[/font][/font][font="Courier New"]N - - => Don't post.
- N - => Don't post.
Y Y N => Post
Y Y Y => Post and update the story to cover the gap.
[/font][font="Arial"]To some degree you could map this matrix to your matrix, but you would need multiple columns of weighs depending on the circumstance. If you don't adjust the weights based on the situation, you will end up always picking the one that is always the compromise of a range of hypothetical situation, but never the best one for the actual situation. If you need to constantly change the weights to adapt to the circumstance, then you are moving toward this type of matrix.[/font] In any case, both methods can suffer from blind-spots. For example, for N-- I wrote Don't Post. What if that is not the best action? How would I know? How would I see that it is not the best? The test is that if it doesn't feel right, then something is amiss. Then what is missing? At this point, at least you know what questions you have already asked. Therefore, a way to tell what blind-spot you have is to brainstorm with the purpose of asking a new question, to be aware of the possible actions and situations. But by the definition of blind-spot, even brainstorm is not guaranteed to reveal every variable.
I think the sentence could be changed like this:
[quote name='After']People have shadows not because they can't make decisions in general, but because they have blind-spots in their thinking.
* * *
The other kind of decision matrix
[font="Arial"]When you mentioned decision matrix the first time, I thought that you were referring to something else. But then I googled 'decision matrices' and found that they aren't what I thought they were. [/font][font="Arial"]Your decision matrix is a evaluation method in which you list the possible actions as headers, and score them by criteria. [/font][font="Arial"]My decision matrix is a map that relates circumstances to an appropriate action. The axes are the dimensions of the circumstance, and the cells contain the action appropriate for that circumstance. My decision matrix is also inapplicable for the problems about shadows. [/font][font="Arial"]Here I am just trying to show you what it is. I don't know the name for it.
Example:
a) He should just say it. Then at least he won't regret for not saying it.
b) He should learn how to say it in a way that people would listen
c) He should believe that people could learn on their own
d) He should believe that for some lessons, people could only learn from their own experience.
e) He should believe that what was an ordeal for him wasn't an ordeal for someone else.
f) He should do something so that the others wouldn't get near that situation in the first place.
Based on the concepts above, whether to tell the message depends on the following:
1) Will you regret for not saying it
2) Will people reject the message
2) Can people learn on their own
4) Is it a lesson that people can only learn from experience
5) Does the listener need the message
6) Can the problem that the message addresses be avoided
Conceptually, you could consider that each of these six dimensions takes on a Yes or a No. Then if you map it as a matrix, there are 2^6 = 64 cells. Each cell represents a specific situation. If these six questions are all that matters to describe a circumstance, and if you could fill out all 64 cells with appropriate actions that you can do, then you can handle any situation as long as you can tell which situation you are in. Here are the assumptions without the run-on sentence:
D1) You know all dimensions that are important to classify the situations
D2) You know the appropriate action given a specific situation
D3) You know how to tell what situation you are in.
D4) You can perform the appropriate action.
The short conclusion is that if you have a blind-spot, and the blind-spot is blocking something important enough to give you a shadow, you are screwed regardless which matrix you use. Decision matrices are still useful because a person's blind-spot changes over time, and it saves time of re-thinking what to do in a given situation.
This is my decision matrix regarding if I should post something:
The main dimensions are:
D1) Would people want to read it? (Yes / No)
D2) Do I have time to post it? (Yes / No)
D3) Am I explaining my story? (Yes / No)
These are the actions:
[font="Courier New"]1 2 3
[/font][/font][font="Courier New"]N - - => Don't post.
- N - => Don't post.
Y Y N => Post
Y Y Y => Post and update the story to cover the gap.
[/font][font="Arial"]To some degree you could map this matrix to your matrix, but you would need multiple columns of weighs depending on the circumstance. If you don't adjust the weights based on the situation, you will end up always picking the one that is always the compromise of a range of hypothetical situation, but never the best one for the actual situation. If you need to constantly change the weights to adapt to the circumstance, then you are moving toward this type of matrix.[/font] In any case, both methods can suffer from blind-spots. For example, for N-- I wrote Don't Post. What if that is not the best action? How would I know? How would I see that it is not the best? The test is that if it doesn't feel right, then something is amiss. Then what is missing? At this point, at least you know what questions you have already asked. Therefore, a way to tell what blind-spot you have is to brainstorm with the purpose of asking a new question, to be aware of the possible actions and situations. But by the definition of blind-spot, even brainstorm is not guaranteed to reveal every variable.
October 04, 2011 07:12 PM
Perhaps a person with a shadow could be referred to as a shadowed person or a person in shadow.
A decision making matrix can be like that, with everything being yes or no, but it can also have numbers. For example you might think taking an action will please person A +3 and displease person B -7, and then you can multiply those by how much you care (care about person A's opinion 70%, care about person B's opinion 20%) to see whether the net outcome is positive or negative.
Normally I would consider a blind spot to be D1 or D3, a flaw in the way the matrix is constructed or used.
It was interesting to hear how you decide whether to post or not. Mine is a bit different:
After a thread has started:
- Would I enjoy or dislike writing the post on a scale of -10 to +10 (anything above 4 I will post without further consideration)
- Is a reply from me expected? If yes, my sense of obligation and/or politeness can add up to +3 to the number from above.
- Do I have something to say that I think would be helpful/pleasing to another person? If yes, I enjoy being helpful and this can again raise the number as much as +3. But if I think I will get negative responses this can lower it as much as -6.
Whether to start a new thread is a much more complicated evaluation.
[font="Arial"]
Conceptually, you could consider that each of these six dimensions takes on a Yes or a No. Then if you map it as a matrix, there are 2^6 = 64 cells. Each cell represents a specific situation. If these six questions are all that matters to describe a circumstance, and if you could fill out all 64 cells with appropriate actions that you can do, then you can handle any situation as long as you can tell which situation you are in. Here are the assumptions without the run-on sentence:
D1) You know all dimensions that are important to classify the situations
D2) You know the appropriate action given a specific situation
D3) You know how to tell what situation you are in.
D4) You can perform the appropriate action.
The short conclusion is that if you have a blind-spot, and the blind-spot is blocking something important enough to give you a shadow, you are screwed regardless which matrix you use. Decision matrices are still useful because a person's blind-spot changes over time, and it saves time of re-thinking what to do in a given situation.[/font]
A decision making matrix can be like that, with everything being yes or no, but it can also have numbers. For example you might think taking an action will please person A +3 and displease person B -7, and then you can multiply those by how much you care (care about person A's opinion 70%, care about person B's opinion 20%) to see whether the net outcome is positive or negative.
Normally I would consider a blind spot to be D1 or D3, a flaw in the way the matrix is constructed or used.
It was interesting to hear how you decide whether to post or not. Mine is a bit different:
After a thread has started:
- Would I enjoy or dislike writing the post on a scale of -10 to +10 (anything above 4 I will post without further consideration)
- Is a reply from me expected? If yes, my sense of obligation and/or politeness can add up to +3 to the number from above.
- Do I have something to say that I think would be helpful/pleasing to another person? If yes, I enjoy being helpful and this can again raise the number as much as +3. But if I think I will get negative responses this can lower it as much as -6.
Whether to start a new thread is a much more complicated evaluation.
I want to help design a "sandpark" MMO. Optional interactive story with quests and deeply characterized NPCs, plus sandbox elements like player-craftable housing and lots of other crafting. If you are starting a design of this type, please PM me. I also love pet-breeding games.
350
October 04, 2011 09:31 PM
[color="#1C2837"]Whether to start a new thread is a much more complicated evaluation.[/quote]
[color="#1C2837"]I use a quasi-delta maximal outlier deviation matrix approach.
[color="#1C2837"]1) Insert alcohol
[color="#1C2837"]2) Start typing
[color="#1C2837"]3) Click post
[color="#1C2837"]QED
1,007
October 07, 2011 03:29 PM
Ending scene of my entry:
* * *
[font="Arial"]It has been more than a week since I last saw Skyle. In this past week, I entered a fantasy character contest and used her as my character. I hoped that she wouldn’t mind. I also hoped that she wouldn’t mind being called a fantasy character, since no one would possibly believe otherwise. It may sound trivial now but I debated that for a long time. [/font]
[font="Arial"]The atmosphere certainly felt weird when we met again. She saw me while she was lying on the ground but she pulled down her cap to cover her eyes. She had this expression that was in the middle of “I don’t care” and “You better say something.” [/font]
I[font="Arial"] thought:[/font]
a) [font="Arial"]Skyle is not in a good mood.[/font]
b) [font="Arial"]Skyle is being a jerk.[/font]
c) [font="Arial"]…[/font]
I said, “Well, how was it?”
[font="Arial"]“How was what?” she asked in a tone that made me feel that she knew.[/font]
I:
a) [font="Arial"]Ask her about that shadow[/font]
b) [font="Arial"]…[/font] [font="Arial"]“It might sound trivia now, but I debated about it for a long time. I tried my best. Or at least I meant what I said.” I said as I sat down on the ground.[/font]
[font="Arial"]“And people kind of like you, you know.” I added.[/font]
[font="Arial"]Although she covered her eyes, I could tell that she was embarrassed because she was forcing herself not to smile. I said, [/font]
[font="Arial"]“… As a fantasy character, I meant.”[/font]
[font="Arial"]“Jerk!” She sat up to hit me with her cap. I guess we were even. [/font]
[font="Arial"]“So what was I like as a shadow?” I asked, after waiting for her to proper her cap.[/font]
[font="Arial"]“You were a little boy who can’t spell,” She said with a grin, then resumed her usual pose lying on the ground.[/font]
[font="Arial"]I didn’t know what she saw but that sounded about right. I was glad that Skyle didn’t hide the fact that she went into my mind. If this were a story, it could have added a lot of drama. But life isn’t dramatic in this way when people don’t make it to be. Skyle didn’t because she didn’t have to. With her I could always count on moving on, like the cloud drifting across our wheat field. [/font]
* * *
[font="Arial"]It has been more than a week since I last saw Skyle. In this past week, I entered a fantasy character contest and used her as my character. I hoped that she wouldn’t mind. I also hoped that she wouldn’t mind being called a fantasy character, since no one would possibly believe otherwise. It may sound trivial now but I debated that for a long time. [/font]
[font="Arial"]The atmosphere certainly felt weird when we met again. She saw me while she was lying on the ground but she pulled down her cap to cover her eyes. She had this expression that was in the middle of “I don’t care” and “You better say something.” [/font]
I[font="Arial"] thought:[/font]
a) [font="Arial"]Skyle is not in a good mood.[/font]
b) [font="Arial"]Skyle is being a jerk.[/font]
c) [font="Arial"]…[/font]
I said, “Well, how was it?”
[font="Arial"]“How was what?” she asked in a tone that made me feel that she knew.[/font]
I:
a) [font="Arial"]Ask her about that shadow[/font]
b) [font="Arial"]…[/font] [font="Arial"]“It might sound trivia now, but I debated about it for a long time. I tried my best. Or at least I meant what I said.” I said as I sat down on the ground.[/font]
[font="Arial"]“And people kind of like you, you know.” I added.[/font]
[font="Arial"]Although she covered her eyes, I could tell that she was embarrassed because she was forcing herself not to smile. I said, [/font]
[font="Arial"]“… As a fantasy character, I meant.”[/font]
[font="Arial"]“Jerk!” She sat up to hit me with her cap. I guess we were even. [/font]
[font="Arial"]“So what was I like as a shadow?” I asked, after waiting for her to proper her cap.[/font]
[font="Arial"]“You were a little boy who can’t spell,” She said with a grin, then resumed her usual pose lying on the ground.[/font]
[font="Arial"]I didn’t know what she saw but that sounded about right. I was glad that Skyle didn’t hide the fact that she went into my mind. If this were a story, it could have added a lot of drama. But life isn’t dramatic in this way when people don’t make it to be. Skyle didn’t because she didn’t have to. With her I could always count on moving on, like the cloud drifting across our wheat field. [/font]
This topic is closed to new replies.
Advertisement
Popular Topics
Advertisement
