How do those of you feel who have broken into the industry and are busy coding away or writing GDDs day-in, day-out. I've been working in a small games studio for a year now. I'm getting a little antsy. I think it's mainly because what I loved doing was creating my ideas. I'm an artist and a coder and games have remained the main point in my life I enjoy most ever since I played ASCII roguelike games at the age of three. But my games were my art. They weren't always something I wanted to share with the world. sometimes they were my emotional masterpieces, sometimes they were experiments but they were always ideas I was compelled to produce. My life is more fulfilling and less anxiety driven than it's been in the past, but I can't help but feel this is totally different from what I actually wanted. I tried and failed many times before I got here and now I'm unsettled and still am addicted to failure by some grim curiosity. A stable and fulfilling job is most important in life. I have enough to get by and it's a job developing games! This experience has taught me so much. I don't spend any time outside of work coding for fun any more. But I do draw and am learning new languages. What are your views?

This isn't a Breaking In topic. Moving.

I'll start drawing up a proposal for our newest forum, Breaking Out of the game industry.

Quote: Original post by Promit
I'll start drawing up a proposal for our newest forum, Breaking Out of the game industry.

lol...

are you incapable of working on side projects? It'll take you a long time to finish, but at least they'll be things you're passionate about.

Side projects? I wish I could get enough time to work on them. Wife, daughter and Day job tend to take up most of the available time.

Then again, I am not in the Game Industry, so Game Dev stuff is always a side-project.

Quote: My life is more fulfilling and less anxiety driven than it's been in the past, but I can't help but feel this is totally different from what I actually wanted.

"I am more fulfilled but it's not what I wanted."

Quote: I tried and failed many times before I got here and now I'm unsettled and still am addicted to failure by some grim curiosity. A stable and fulfilling job is most important in life.

"A stable fulfilling job is the most important thing but it unsettles me."

Question mark.

Quote: Original post by LockePick
Question mark.

LockPicke, you are right to point out he contradiction in my logic. I refer primarily to what I "want" as being able to bring life to my ideas. But we all have ideas and many people have good ones. However I underestimated the feeling of creating based upon my ideas compared to other peoples, particuarly when micromanagement is involved.

However it brings money to the table and that is the primary concern and I should not question my place in life based upon this but put more force into my hobby projects.

Personally I think it's the collaborative creative results that are the most interesting to me. Like jamming with a band, the drummer may not be playing exactly what you would be playing if you were behind the drums, but he's bringing his own spectrum into the picture and creating something that surprises everyone.

Just like you can't tickle yourself, you need others to contribute to keep things interesting (odd, but you understand)

So instead of having blinders and seeing only your own ideas exactly how they should be, look at the bigger picture of the collaboration and find interest in what it is.

If you can't do this, and you see game development as a more of an art of personal expression only, then find the passion to work on it outside of work or become a starving artist.

Quote: Original post by alenacat

However it brings money to the table and that is the primary concern and I should not question my place in life based upon this but put more force into my hobby projects.

Something like this:

Hobby projects on the side are a nice way to burn out in two years if used as replacement for day job. Family, friends or similar work out much better to compensate.

Quote: Original post by alenacat
A stable and fulfilling job is most important in life.

Hell no. The most important thing in life is being happy. A stable and fulfilling job is a tool to accomplish that, but not a goal in life. Otherwise you life to work, which is like the worst thing EVER in my opinion :P.