Hey Heres a basic storyline or intro or basically what the game is about. I haven't done a full stroyline that follows through the whole game. Please could you look at this and give me some c&c on where I can improve the story. A top undercover agent (Assassin Hunter ), “Main Player”, of the European Union, is found guilty and sent to life imprisonment in a high security underground prison after shooting and killing an eleven year old boy in order to destroy his target. “Name of Leader”, being the father of the deceased boy and leader of the “Group Name” terrorist group, decides to take revenge on the European government, killing off high profile political powers to bring down the hierarchy. The government soon fights back and cities and towns become war zones. People being forced to abandon what they have and flee to far away lands. As the American and Soviet governments try to aid, “Name of Leader” becomes headstrong and begins to unleash the same punishment on them. As did the European Union, these two powers crumble from the inside. The “Group Name” group, now the size of an army, seem to be unstoppable. Neighbouring countries, fearing the same might happen to them, keep their distance and watch empires disappear. After four years, all that can bee seen across Europe, the States and the Soviet Union is death and destruction. Cities and towns lose all essence of life and a dreary atmosphere hangs overhead. It appears as though half the world is being commanded by a madman. With all guards away fighting the terrorist group, “Main Player” has to find away to escape and try and use his skills to defeat the “Group Name”, using the same tactics as “Name of Leader”, starting from the inside out. Thanks

why was the agent jailed for killing a boy? Undercover agents usually have a license to kill. Was he captured and imprisoned in another country? It makes little sense to me that the European Gov't (his employers) would jail their top man because of the killing of a boy. It would be easier to kill him and deny their connection to the assassin. Letting him live would be a mistake since he probably knows too much about the European Gov't.

Perhaps the the target was in a country ouside of Europe and the agent was caught by the local govt. Trying to escape the crime scene, he was found guilty by the local courts as a murderer and put in jail. His employers can not use their influence to free the agent since the agent's cover would be blown. However this would lead into a possible loophole in the story. Why would the father of the dead boy not kill the agent in prison, where he is helpless? It would seem logical that the father would first kill the agent responsible for killing his son before taking on the European Gov't.

Hmm, I see your points.

Quote: Perhaps the the target was in a country ouside of Europe and the agent was caught by the local govt.

I like that, and it does make a bit more sense.

As for

Quote: Why would the father of the dead boy not kill the agent in prison

It's a high security underground prison. The reason why he takes on the government is because he can't get to the agent. He attacks the government cause they are the ones that employed him.

But then comes the point that the father could just buy his way into the prison and kill the agent. Hmm.

Any thoughts?

How come the leader didn't unleash all this destruction to begin with? Surely, that's been his goal all along, so why did he wait till his son has been killed?

Why would one just get up in the morning and say, I think I'll kill the government today. There has to be a cause, and in this case the cause was his son. Bare in mind that he is the leader of a terrorist group and would already have a rebellion for the government. As well, he didn't unleash mass destruction, destruction came about because the government starting fighting back, and a war begun.

Agent works for EU. He is assigned to kill the president of country "A". The president of "A" happens to be the friend of "Terrorist Leader". As such, country "A" is supports and provides the resources for the terrorist organization. EU does not know about the terrorist organization yet. The president is currently on a trip in country "B" with his nephew (son of Terrorist Leader). Agent kills the pres but had accidentally killed the boy and got caught by country "B" police. Agent is sentenced to maximum prison in country "B". Killing of the president creates a power vacuum invcountry "A". Terrorist Leader uses opportunity to take over country "A".

Still pissed off at the killing of his son, Terrorist Leader uses his powers as president to negotiate the transfer of Agent from country "B" to his country to kill him personally. EU sees this as a chance to rescue Agent. Terrorist Leader also wants to kill Agent on the way (to remove blame from him). EU special forces and Terrorist forces attack the prison convoy. Surprised by each other, the EU and terror forces fight. In the end, nobody was sure of the body count. It is assumed that the EU and terror group killed each other and the prison convey. In reality, The Agent and 1 or 2 EU special forces escape. However, they are still in country "B" - hostile territory. They can not simply go back to EU (everyone thought they died). They bid their time.

After hearing that the Agent was killed. The Terrorist Leader attacks EU using his terror squads. US and Soviet can not help because Terrorist Leader is the leader of country "A" too many political hurdles to simply attack another country without provocation and there is no evidence that Terrorist Leader is the mastermind behind the attacks on Europe. With the terror groups being backed by a nation's resources, EU has no choice but to declare martial law similar in Iraq. The strain of continual fighting against terror groups inside europe collapses the economy of the EU. people flee from cities and the remaining people in cities generally live a hard life. The Agent and EU forces in country "B" decides going back to EU is pointless since they have a lot of problems back there. It would be better to sneak into country "A" from country "B" since Terrorist Leader does not expect any threat from that direction. They do not notify EU of their mission to prevent information leaks. They wait 4 years gathering intelligence inside country "A" to have enough info about Terrorist Leader to take him, and his organization out. Only one thing remains, as long as Terrorist leader is alive they can not simple inform the world of their knowledge. They must kill Terrorist Leader, creating confusion in the Terrorist Organization and while the Organization is recovering, spread the information needed by the other countries to take effective action against the Organization.

I thought of this scenario because a terrorist organization cannot defeat a country in open conflict, much less 3 world superpowers. By making the Terrorist Leader a rightful leader of country "A" other superpowers can not simply attack him. He will also have the capability to supply his organization with bombs, weapons, provided he can hide the connections of the weapons to him. Before the killing of his son, he could only get small quantities of weapons from his friend (former pres of "A") by taking control, he has access to more power, and able to attack EU.

Man, you must of really taken some time to write that. I like it though, it still sticks with what I wanted and it has a more solid structure, although I could tweak it a bit.

Thanks a lot.

no problem. Good luck on your game. What type is it anyway?
I'm thinking an RPG or FPS with RPG elements.

It's gonna be a FPS. I want it to be a vast sought of setting with broken buildings etc, as well as make it a kind of stealth game (not like Splinter Cell though, more action). I also want the main player to be interactive with other people that can help him along the way.

Just throwing another idea: following the same line as yapposai, but instead of getting captured by the authorities of country B (what kinda spy gets caught!?), the hero gets betrayed by his own government (the EU)

Once the terrorist becomes leader of country A, he demands the hero to be turned over to him and a large cash sum to pay for the troubles they've caused. The EU turn over the hero to stop the terrorist exposing their use of espionage that ended with the death of an innocent child (or some such).
He attacks the convy with his terrorists to steal his own money, so he can secretly use it as his own instead of having it in the countries funding.
In the confussion the hero manages to escape and is considered dead.